Sitting down with the part of you that wants the change and the part that keeps protecting the old behavior, and getting them to agree on terms.
We find the positive intent behind the cigarette — the pause, the permission, the identity — and agree on a replacement the protective part actually accepts.
Lining the desired change up with what you already care about most, so willpower stops being the fuel.
Quitting gets attached to what you already care about most, so it stops depending on daily willpower.
Attaching a calm, resourceful state to a physical cue you can use in the moment you need it.
A physical cue is conditioned to the calm the cigarette used to deliver, available in the exact minute the urge arrives.
Rehearsing the new response in the exact situations where the old one used to run.
We rehearse the first drink with friends, the drive home, the argument — the specific scenes where relapse used to happen.